I’m Now an Official “Room Mother”

Fall has arrived in the Midwest with a whoosh and a shiver. Every front porch has a bale of hay and some Indian corn to “Welcome” guests. Brightly colored Mums line sidewalks and driveways. There’s a pumpkin patch on every corner & tractors toting families around fields late into the night. It’s bonfire time. Hot apple cider time. Gaining seven pounds on “Fun sized” candy time. Hello, Autumn you seductive little minx. I love you, and my cardigan will cover what Kit Kat has done.

I’ve added another layer of crazy to my general insanity routine this year. I am a room mother. *She says proudly* I have earned my beige minivan. It’s official. But wait…there’s more as they say. I have TWO kids in grade school. So, I’m two-two-two room mothers in ONE. Double bonus perk of kookypants proportion. Add this to the fact I can’t do anything halfway and you get me in pajamas more than half the day while I work on crafts that are utterly unnecessary.

Room mother sounds all warm and fuzzy but there are rules. Unspoken, sliding eyes rules. I don’t know them. (AKA choose to ignore them)I get the eyes a lot. But, hey, I’m all-in and I’m a pretty quick study. So, my first job as room mother was to bring pumpkin rolls to the teacher’s lounge by 10am last week. Ha! I brought TWO pumpkin rolls AND a display of chocolate covered pretzels AND I was there by NINE because I drove the kids to school that day *breathes on knuckles*.  I killed it. *fist pump* *Tebows*

Next up: I am assigned to both kids’ classrooms for the Fall Festival Party thingy. I am to bring plates for both classes, plus napkins & baggies to one and a craft to the other. I’ve yet to figure how I’m going to divide myself in half and attend both parties, but I’ll get that sorted later. First up, I bought the standard Halloween print plates. When I got home, I was sad at their desperate need of tszuj. So, I made a few adjustments. (Read: tossed those out and started over). Now the plates I will bring look like those up there in the top corner. I did that. Me & my hot glue gun plus a costly trip to the local craft store. #Winning. I should never go there without supervision. My 4 year old didn’t help. She and I both wanted everything.

Next up: That craft assignment of mine. Yeah, I can’t find a craft that 4th graders will want to do or haven’t done already in their five long years of school (seven if they went to pre-school). So, I found this awesome game on Marth Stewart’s website. It involves balloon popping, so I emailed the teacher to see if that was allowed….in case some kid was afraid of the sound or of balloons (I had a friend who had a horrible fear of balloons. Imagine the fun I had with her at every opportunity. What a stupid fear. I mean, she should save that energy for stuff that can kill you, like monkeys, but whatever).  OR if they thought stabbing balloons was too violent or whatever. Teacher says it’s fine. Teacher is lovely.

BUT I was assigned to “Crafts” and this looks a lot like a “Game” and there’s already a mom doing “Games.”

*Taps toe.* *Chews nail*

Here’s the thing. I really like the Martha Stewart deal. So, Ima do it. I know. I know. But I really wanna and, hey, I’m a volunteer and also what kid has ever complained they had to play too many games at their school party? Whatever. There will be pictures to come because – of course – I have a lot of work to put the thing together. Did I mention I found it on Martha Stewart? I am no Martha, so I gotta go get started :)

4 comments to I’m Now an Official “Room Mother”

  • O.M.G. – I’m so glad this is universal! I’ve done this kind of thing for more years than I can count – my two sons are thirteen years apart (yes, 13. And yes, I’ve been married to the same man ALL that time!). And I tried really hard to be the crafting, creative, baking Mom. It was fun, but it also stressed me out on a level I never knew I possessed. Good luck to you, Julie!

  • I was a room mother way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and we were able to serve the kids all the cake and candy we wanted. There were no rules either spoken or implied. Peanut allergies were not invented yet and religion was taught at home. Ahhhhh… those were the good ol’ days.

  • Hi Deb & Mariam! Sorry for the late response, but I was so tickled by both your comments. Ahhhh we room mothers are a special bunch, are we not? LOL Thank you for making me smile :)

  • [...] You can be a successful author and a devoted mother. [...]

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