Ix-nay the Unflower-Say

My blog has been up about two weeks. For most of that time, I have had a little sunflower in the top corner. I didn’t like the sunflower, but it went with my color scheme. Before choosing the flower, I had searched thousands of images for something relating to a slush pile. I originally found a bookcase to stretch across my page, but that just didn’t suit. The sunflower was next, but its days were numbered. Finally, I found a cute little stack of books that does the job nicely. Ta-da. Books again, but the right ones.

Now, in the process of designing my site, I have learned something else about myself. Here it is: I have a really convoluted view of who I am. If you ask me my favorite color, I’ll tell you pink every time. But, I couldn’t set up a pink website. Who am I Barbie? Hello Kitty? Strawberry Shortcake? You see the problem then. I tried to think of another color that said something about me. I was shocked to find that the orange/red scheme was so energetic, busy, upbeat, and fast looking. It fit and I loved it. I was shocked. Though none of the colors are anything I’d wear. I’d never have chosen them, but I did.

The colors seemed off still because I’m not into them.

We’ve been having a ton of summer storms lately and I love storms.  I frequently dance in the rain, stand in the rain, sing in the rain. It’s true. Having kids with me makes the neighbors worry less, but luckily have few neighbors. Anyway, I got the best idea. I should change my color scheme to one of purple hues with gray and black touches. I’m still excited thinking about it, though I know how that went. I found an awesome picture of a thunderstorm in just those colors. It was my muse. Then, I spoke sweetly to my web master who had no problem with the change, and we began.

You know how some of the best ideas just aren’t. This was one of those. About two and a half hours in to changing every tiny line and character, I hated it. It looked ill. I didn’t like any of the shades of violet. The gray reminded me of someone’s skin who had been ill for a long while, and the overall feel of it wasn’t exciting or violently moody as I had imagined. Instead, it just didn’t work. It made me feel sad. So…I broke the news to my ever patient, and devastatingly sexy webmaster who began the retransformation. The process took the rest of the evening. Trying to get things back to where they were was a slow process, but he did it. I have a great team.

So, even my writer’s blog is teaching me about me. No matter how broody and mysterious that I think I may be. I’m not. I’m not a storm cloud. Sadly, I’m more like the stinky sunflower who I am thankful to be rid of. I am not ominous or dangerous. I am just unabashedly happy and hopeful. I have a temper, sure and my share of awful moments, but they are the side dish to a seven course meal of perky.

I am very annoying.

Shoot.

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