Rude? Really?

Everyone knows that any aspiring author worth her ink is a cyber stalker. Let’s just get that out of the way. Having said that, please know, I am worth a lot of ink.

I have a list on Twitter of agents, editors and publishing related individuals whom I watch – carefully. What’s that? Win a critique? I’m on it! What? Open to submissions? I’m THERE. Oooooo! #askeditor at 4:00? Put it on my virtual calendar. I will bring coffee.

So, being an avid reader of what’s going on in the work lives of those I stalk, I am often shocked. Like, my mouth falls open and I sit there contemplating what I just read. Are people kidding me? Seriously? Are they sure?

Some writers are plain old out of their gourds. They submit to agents and announce that they are the next Stephenie Meyer. They insist that their manuscript will sell millions worldwide. They are the next phenom. Absolutely. Those people are silly-nuts. Gotta appreciate their Chutzpah.  Others, however, are ruin-their-potential-career-and-blacklist-themselves-crazy. The quickest route to that kind of  crazy is to  insult the agents which you seek.

First off, do you really think that being rude will get you anywhere, ever?

Secondly, do you think the agent will see how rude you are and admire your power or something? I don’t get it.
Next, suppose those rudies really do think the agent is a flipping loser or moron, then what? Do they not suspect that said agent will not tell other agents? I’m not kidding. I mean, if I know about what you’re up to, you can bet your buttons that every other agent does as well.

Imagine your very rude face hanging in literary offices across the globe.Yep, even agents across the pond know about your games Mr/Ms Rudeypants.

Done venting. Now, I will party because for every moronic-career-killing-ding-dong, there is one less competitor for my agent’s attention. Yep, I said it. You are out before you got in, and that is no sad story for authors who are doing all they can to play the game, work the leads and spread a sunny disposition. Your loss. Our win.

Now, I will wait to receive a record number of comments – from rudies telling me I don’t know what I’m talking about.

Whatev.

So predictable.

And, Haha on you :)

9 comments to Rude? Really?

  • How about a comment from another writer who feels just like you? Awesome. I hear/read some of the stories and all I can do is scratch my head and wonder what some people are thinking. That’s cool, though…as you said, more for us.

  • Julie Anne Lindsey

    Abra – Exactly LOL. Thankyou!

    Jeannie – I sit shaking my head in awe some days. What are they thinking? So thankful for other polite adn happy writers like us ! Thankyou!

  • Genius! Major “Kahones” “Gonads”!!!!!

    Totally made my day!

  • KAK

    LOL. You are absolutely right! Lumping along with the rude ones are the spammy ones. You know when Spammy does it, because all the agents tweet the “Danger, Will Robinson, Loon on the Loose.”

  • HA HA! I love it! I wonder about people. Thanks for posting this. I know there are those crazy writers out there, but it helps us not-quite-as-crazy writers feel a little more normal to be reminded of them.

  • Julie Anne Lindsey

    KAK: Yes! I have seen agents tweet that too. Warning! Warning! and trade horror stories! I laugh, though I really shouldn’t!

    Ruth: Right! We (writers) are all a little…quirky (lol) in similar ways to each other but so diff. from everyone else. It’s so funny. Good thing agents like quirky, or maybe we all seem normal to them now! Ha. (I like my quirks too).

  • Go Julie! You said it. I cringe over those stories wondering why these people just can’t play nice.

  • Agreed! I can’t believe some of the crazy things I read about on agent twitters and blogs… Some people are just plain wacky with their submissions.

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